S1E1 - Churches Should Teach Self-Compassion, Not Shame

Despite many pastoral proclamations of God’s love, church is not a place I learned to love myself. Instead, I learned to distrust myself, see myself as evil, and feel guilty/responsible for Jesus’ murder. Prayers of confession were meant to assuage this constant guilt, but they couldn’t touch my underlying Calvinist beliefs that I was bad.

At home, I witnessed this shame fuel both my mother’s religiosity and her alcoholism. It makes sense, in a supremely messed up way: if a person truly believes they are evil, then alcohol and drugs are one of the few...